You had to admit once and for all: you have lost. You hated losing more than anything else but this time you lost; you lost to his deep grey eyes, to his gorgeous face, to him. And that was since the day you first saw him, it wasn’t something new. Yet, how could you fall for your superior, for him out of all people? At first you didn’t even believe it yourself, you just thought that you were looking on the window out of boredom but you realized you had lost your interest when he wasn’t there.
After a month you were already exasperated from the thoughts of him that followed you everywhere you could barely sleep. You were sick of it, you loved him to the point of hating that fact, to the point of going mad. And that’s why you came up with this “great” idea of finally taking this burden from your heart and confess. Let them laugh, let them ridicule you but you will tell him. You had at least one drop of pride left, enough to make you confess only and only if you are alone with him because you knew you couldn’t possibly stand all those idiots hear your thoughts.
As you were ready to get downstairs you heard someone knocking at the door. That’d be incredibly rare for you so you hurried to open.
-Cadet ___ good morning, he greeted.
-Heichou! G-good mor-morning.
Ashamed, you put your hand at your mouth in sign of excusing you felt like standing on needless, your whole body was itching and you felt your cheeks getting hot. Not to mention that he was standing in front of your door, he also called you by your first name.
-it’s Rivaille. After breakfast come to my office with the paperwork. Tell Erwin, he’ll give them to you.
-Certainly sir! You were so embarrassed you couldn’t look in his eyes
-Has something happened? He raised one of his brows at you which made you smile foolishly.
-No, nothing. I just haven’t drunk my morning coffee, that’s all.
He watched you with a usual motionless face, even though every muscle of your body was tensed and your heart beat as fast as a rabbit’s.
-It is not good to drink coffee from such an age, he stated.
-Oh yes, of course.
You were so dazzled you just agreed with everything he said and for a moment you forgot how to salute, you quickly remembered it was the right hand on the left side, near the heart. He left and you closed the door breathing heavily. You had decided to confess so you would, no more delays.
Deciding to skip breakfast you headed to Erwin’s office. you knocked twice, being allowed to enter you rotated the doorknob.
-Commander, corporal Rivaille asked me to deliver him the paperwork, you said in a blow.
He searched for a moment then handed you a mountain of papers.
-Here you go.
-Thank you, you said before leaving.
The papers got both of your hands busy so you couldn’t knock.
-Rivaille heichou, it’s me ___. Can I come in?
There was no respond for what you felt an eternity but then he appeared in front of your eyes again.
-Let me handle those, he told you taking the papers from your hands.
You pleaded for the courage to come more than you ever prayed in your whole life.
-I love you Rivaille. I am ashamed of myself because of that but I can’t help it. Laugh, do whatever you want I just wanted to tell you this because ever since I-
A touch of a rose on your lips made you realize that he had kissed you and before you knew they were both gone.
-I know. Me too.
It was all like a dream...